Random Woman in Target

I was shopping in Target last week with Greg’s Mom. I started to feel a little strange so I stopped in a less busy aisle and tested. I don’t remember what number came up, I know I was low though. So I grabbed a juice box from my bag and started sucking away on it.

I looked up and realized these two older ladies were staring at me. I tend to get a little dopey and well down right rude when I am low. I don’t know if I was giving them the evil eye, or what. One of the ladies came over and said something to the effect of “are you a Diabetic?” I really can’t tell you exactly how I replied. I’m sure I was probably snotty though. She was very kind and soft spoken and asked if she could talk to me. Sure, why not. I was low. I didn’t know half of what was going on around me.

She took a deep breath and told me about her dead husband who died from complications of Diabetes. Immediately I thought, “OK, stop!!” I knew where this was going and I honestly had no patience for it in my current condition. Still I kept my mouth shut and just stared at her stupidly while she lectured me on why drinking juice was no good for me and how I should really see a “Diabetes Doctor” because they specialize in my condition.

Eventually I found my voice and explained that I was not a type 2 but a type 1. I told her that I was drinking juice because my sugar was low. I think I told her that while her attempts to educate me were well meaning, they were pointless. I thought I said it nicely. However judging from how she huffed and walked away, I guess I was wrong.

I would not have intentionally spoken rudely to an old lady. I was low though and some things you just don’t have control over when your sugar is out of range. In all honesty I think what she did was sweet. She was trying to do me a favor. She wasn’t nasty, she didn’t call me an idiot. I do think I insulted her and I feel bad about it. Simply because she is the first person to approach me in public who didn’t say rude, outlandish things to me. She was touched by the disease in the worst way possible, she watched a loved one die from it.

I wonder if she is as mad at her husband as I am at my grandmother? She was diagnosed with type 2 shortly after my diagnosis with type 1. She did nothing to change her life. She didn’t test, she didn’t exercise, she simply thought she was immune. By the time my grandmother died, she had lost her leg from a massive uncontrollable infection. I try to remember her whenever I even consider not fighting anymore.

It makes me wonder what my loved ones will say to people about my death? I will most likely lose my life to this disease. It won’t be because I didn’t try though.